I really screwed the pooch on these sentences. Man, I hate when old Cuban guys tell me about how awesome it was to bang sheep when they were young, and here I am talking about fucking dogs. But, I really thought I would make the midnight express. But here I am on my third sentence with two minutes left… Oh, well… there will be words, regardless. Or irregardless, if you like to make up words. I have to write about the following sentence for four minutes and I feel that I am running out of interesting and original things to say.
There’s a little bit of truth in every lie.
I gotta agree with that one. I’m a good liar. An excellent liar, I’d say. And I always try to keep my lies simple and partially true. If you do something you’re not supposed to be doing and you have a good time, keep the fun in the lie. Maybe you went and bought a dirty magazine instead of going to study at the library?
Did you have a good time at the library?
Hell yes, I did. Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys, oh hell yes, they were solving crimes and getting chloroformed out of their minds and everyone was hooting and hollering and reading from the same book! Fucking awesome!
Speaking of dirty magazines (segue win!), I remember a time before the fish market that sprung across the street from my house, the way shitty relatives spring from dark and cobwebbed corners for people who have won the lottery… oh my god, fuck you, sentence from hell. I remember a time, here we go, when there was a Farm Stores across the street from me.
Shit.
It turned into something else, but I don’t remember what, but FOR A TIME, the Indian dude that ran it had dirty magazines on a little rack next to the fridge that had all the milk in it. I know, how apropos. I would cross the street and buy Snickers bars just to get a peek at the titties through the cellophane wrappers. And now we have the internet, you know?
We have a lil convenience store around here and there’s an Indian dude with his own rack and dirty magazines, and I’m like, seriously? For what? Does this guy have any idea what I just downloaded AND streamed like an hour ago?
I mean, I had four media player windows open to take care of this problem.
